Facing My Pain

I feel so stupid and like a clown
How am I coping by being so down

My heart has betrayed me yet again
My senses have lured me into a pit of pain

How did I become so hopelessly lost
Amidst stormy emotions helplessly tossed

Where is that wise and mature being
Through whose eyes I was once seeing

Where is my inner guiding light
How could she just vanish from sight

Exactly at the time I need her most
I find myself running from pillar to post

Running in search of comforting company
Running in search of loving empathy

Running so I am not left alone
To face my heart, dishevelled and torn

Running so I don't have to pick up the pieces
Running so I don't have to iron the creases

Running in the hope I'll find someone outside
Who will whisk me away on a distant ride

A distant ride to an unknown place
Where my own fears I don't have to face

An escape ride that will distract me so
And make me forget that I had been so low

But don't I know this ride is bound to end
Eventually my heart I must myself tend

This love and empathy I so much crave
Is not like money which I can save

I might just find myself a hero today
Who my sorrows can temporarily slay

Tomorrow though, I might be alone again
Facing my inner sorrows and pain

For sorrows and pain can arise anyday
And my senses and emotions might anytime sway

Do I have courage enough inside of me
As all of this happens, to just watch and see.