20 Sep 1998


I have seen so many of you
I have known you both, tender and harsh
I have felt your support as I willingly leaned
I have experienced your passion as you transferred it to me
But I am not yet conquered

Time and again I want to be won
I want to feel weak and vulnerable
I want to desire a framework of support
But my own strength keeps me up and awake

I fool myself to believe in your flatteries
I train myself to respond to your touches
I teach myself to desire your moves
And all set and programmed, I try to yearn for you

I try to lose myself in passions and arousals
And I do so in my exotic dreams
As my fantasies tease me in all their variety
And my thoughts play around with my feelings

But when you arrive on the scene
You are never enough to carry me away
Perhaps I'm the one that is too strong
Perhaps you have never been the right one

But I use my imaginations to meet my expectations
And created illusions descend on reality
To cover the blemishes and impart the dreamy glow
That fantastical fantasies had conceived

As reality merges with illusionary pictures
It keeps me afloat in clouds awhile
Awhile I believe my soul is with you
Awhile before the clouds begin to rain

I come down dampened with the rain
With the knowledge of reality hovering about
As it sharply contrasts with my perfect visions
Created only to destroy the creator

I believe though You exist somewhere
Very close to what my vision conceived
Muscular, sexy, charming and strong
My jungle boy, I await your song.

11 Sep 1998

Joyous Indulgence

Its feelings that make this world go around
Have you had this feeling that makes you dizzy?
Drives your thoughts to the skies
And makes you smile over and over?

Cant think straight, cant single out,
A reason for this splurge of happiness
Have you felt this pure unconditional joy
That comes from within and the air around?

This desire to fly, to spread ones wings,
This stretching out of arms and closing of eyes
That raises you above the clouds
To make you fly with feet on the ground.

The caress of music, the voice of crickets,
Every little whisper sounding seductive
With your blood dancing in your veins
And pulsating nerves that beat in rhythm

To be able to feel, to roll in Joy
To breathe in slowly, smile after smile,
Rest undisturbed in your private feeling
Experience without having to explain

Have you felt that, just to sit thus
In peace and harmony and unexplainable bliss
Is the greatest form of art, the best sport
The gift of awareness, the blessing of Life. 

5 Sep 1998

Still Moments

You are alive, you breathe, you walk,
But is it your life you’re leading?
Not unless you have your moments
Moments of solitude, moments of peace

Moments you keep aside each day,
For you, yourself and your thoughts
To spend in silence, alone and with friends
To communicate without words or actions

Where thoughts and feelings charge the atmosphere
And the stillness within rises without
To engulf you and make you stay
As the moment just lasts forever

A chord within strikes to resonate,
With the faint drifting notes around,
For then you know you’re living alive
And your life is yours to treasure.

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