Musings on Friendship

Today I was thinking about a dear friend

Who was also a wonderful mentor to me

He always, always had time for me

But this was about five years ago

He was a senior PhD student

My first friend and guide in a new country

He was my one stop contact for every question

Every doubt – academic, social, or personal

I just kept walking into his office

For any clarification or consolation

And I was always greeted with an unconditional smile

And the words, ‘It’s a pleasure to help’

He was there for lunches, there for walks

He was there for a shoulder to cry on

There to guide me in my spiritual quests

And there to help me with everyday queries

Today he is in a different world

Extremely busy as a successful academic

I think back at the time 5 years ago

And miss that amazing friendship

I’ve had many such angelic friends

As I fondly think of them now

They have nurtured me in different ways

At different points in my life

I spoke with another dear friend last night

Also living in a different country now

She is a busy mom, I am a busy mom,

Wrapped up in our very busy worlds

But when I think of the tears and laughter

That we once so wonderfully shared

A tinge of regret crosses my mind

And I wonder if we might ever be like that again

But I am awakened immediately to my present

And I sense the comedy in this feeling of ‘missing’

As I see that today I have different friends

Just waiting to be given their ‘special friend’ status

The many different people that surround me today

The children of my son who frequent my house

Colleagues at my workplace, neighbors on campus,

Are all my ‘present friends’ in disguise

I didn’t really realize during those years

How precious those gifts of friendship were

I did not stop to think that later on

I would look back and miss those times

I sense now that sometime in the future

I’ll look back on today and say

How wonderful a friend or neighbor I had

How wonderful that colleague had been

These times will change, relationships will change

It’s just the way the world functions

Let me savor and cherish what’s in my now

For tomorrow it will be just a memory

Let me throw all of myself into today

Let me engage completely with my ‘here and now’

Let me give loving attention to those around

Who adorn the minutes and hours of my ‘today’

I have these varyingly camouflaged friends

All around me, here, now, today,

Angels that I will fail to recognize

Till I gallantly open my heart and see